I am enjoying a laid back day off today, and a relatively light weekend ahead. I will try to catch up on hobbies. And I also hope to start thinking ahead for the coming year. With that forward look though, I will try to look back and think about all I have accomplished in 2023.
I often get tunnel-visioned in my busy life, seeing only the day ahead or the week ahead, primarily looking at the present. I often fail to see how much better my life has become. A comfortable home. Good health. A career that brings me satisfaction and accomplishment. Relationships with family and friends. Progression in my hobbies and past-times.
Maybe this could be my new hobby. I am definitely not a strong skater. Let’s say I have a lot of potential. Hoping my family can help teach me their ways!
In the year ahead, I hope I can keep up this habit of looking to my future and looking at the past. I think this gives me greater appreciation for how much I have, and how much I have grown. And how much more living and growing I have to do.
Some goals I have for the year include:
-Running a half marathon in the summer. I invested in working with a coach to hone my skills and keep improving.
-Blogging more often, as a way to reflect and grow.
-Spending quality time with my family and friends. Aiming for time with family every 1-2 weeks and time with friends once a month or more.
-Traveling with intention and for joy.
-Continuing to learn languages with Duolingo.
-Continuing to play piano and guitar as an outlet for creativity and relaxation.
-Reading 40 books. I am definitely behind right now but I can feel things starting to pickup. Thank you snow days and cold weather, driving us inside!
Yay for snow days!
-Continuing to save and invest, spending money and time with intention to optimize comfort and joy in life. Avoiding squandering my money or time on things that are not going to return comfort or joy.
-Learn a new skill. I am thinking of trying something in the arts and crafts realm.
I will use this post as a way to reflect at the halfway point and endpoint of the year ahead to gauge how I am growing and meeting my goals. I know perfection is impossible but progression is definitely achievable and laudable. Growing just a little bit each day or week or year will be tremendous. Now it is time to go back to my day off and enjoy this time to unwind and ponder.
I’ve been engaged in the Headspace course, “Managing Stress” in the last few weeks. At first, they start you out light with brief 5 minute meditation sessions, and a few other short videos and breathing exercises each day. Now into the third week, the sessions have lengthened to 10-15 minutes. It sounds a bit hard to believe that such a short session each day can help you. However, I have found that my calmness meter and my “cloak of resilience” has strengthened over these last few weeks.
In our winter “cloaks” to block out the cold, while enjoying beautiful leg lamps to christen the Christmas season. I hope my developing “cloak of resilience” (thanks to meditation) will continue to keep me “warm” and calm.
Little things that would irritate me matter much less, and seem to bounce off of me instead of sticking with me. I have a better perspective on the “big picture” and I am less caught up on little things that used to bother me. The course encourages other ways to boost stress management, including exercise, mindful eating, a gratitude practice, and journaling. I am still in the middle of the course, but I feel myself building a superpower – a superpower of managing my emotions. I am still learning and nowhere near a master. However, I plan to keep building my “meditation muscle”. It is not easy or comfortable. But it is very inspiring to monitor myself and how I feel, and see how I am already emotionally flourishing.
I just read the book “Exercised” by Daniel Lieberman (see here). It discusses the evolution of exercise, and how we have evolved to need this term and to need this idea of separate exercise in our daily lives. I found the story to insightful and educational. It really made me think.
Exercise makes this girl happy.
A big takeaway I gained from it is that exercise can be medicine. It can help with mental health, which I have felt firsthand. It can help decrease your risk of chronic illness. It can slow the effects of aging and debility. It is by no means easy to do, and the book argues we are evolved to rest. But once we can become regularly active, and find ways to make it social and fun, the endorphins and “feel good” aspects of regular exercise keep us going back for more and more. If you are interested in diving into a history of exercise and an analysis of activity now compared to our ancestors, this book is one to definitely checkout.
Summer is here and in full swing! I enjoy the longer days, warmer weather, and kids having time off of school and their frenetic school year activities. Soon enough school will start, and fall will bless us with cooler days. For now, though, the warmth is very welcome!
Fun times, new discoveries.
Though fall is still my favorite season, summer is a close second. I like that this year, we have been blessed to take some time for vacations away from home. It has provided a much appreciated way to liven up our lives, and spend some time away from the nitty gritty and the boring day to day. I feel recharged after this time away. And the anticipation leading up to vacation is fun, too!
To get better at anything requires some degree of hard work. With hard work there is often discomfort. With distance running in particular, there is a threshold pace where true growth and adaptation occurs. This is a pace that hurts, but is something you can maintain for a good chunk of time. This is what can be called “comfortably uncomfortable.”
Getting into my groove.
When I do go on threshold or “workout” runs, which are maybe once or twice a week, I remind myself to get into that comfortably uncomfortable rhythm. It isn’t the most pleasant pace, but I remind myself to avoid pushing myself too hard into higher intensity. And I need to remind myself not too go too easy. I sometimes dwell on the fact that the next day will be recovery, either full rest or a much lighter more leisurely pace, a time to enjoy my surroundings. With hard work, there should be a counterbalance of rest.
With my life too, I have noticed I need to embrace things that are uncomfortable. I am learning I cannot dwell too long in the “uncomfortably uncomfortable” range, as I will definitely tire out. Sprinting all out for a marathon is just not sustainable. The same goes for burning the candles at both ends in a typical day or week. Instead, it takes finesse finding that middle ground, a pace where I am still working hard and growing, but not overdoing it. It is definitely not something I have mastered yet, and probably will always need to keep working at. With practice, though, I am learning to recognize my limits and sense how I feel, so I can adapt my efforts accordingly. I want to grow and do better, but it is important to do so with appropriate levels of stress and hard work. And it is equally important to play, rest, and enjoy life.
St. Patrick’s Day was a couple of weeks ago. I hope you had a good day of festivities, perhaps some green beverages or foods were consumed, maybe a leprechaun visited you or your family, and hopefully some green clothing was worn. What I wanted to think about briefly today is luck, since St. Patrick is often associated with luck.
What are your thoughts on luck? I find it to be definitely a nice thing to have on your side. I used to feel it was totally outside of my control and something that fate or the universe decided would be dealt to me. But I like the thoughts I have read recently that you must be receptive and ready for that lucky break. If you aren’t ready, or looking for luck, you will miss it. You can’t control situations or things that happen to you. But you can control your mindset, and feel open and ready for a lucky, good situation if it comes upon you. If you are closed off to the possibility of something good, I think you will miss your good luck.
My focus right now is to optimize my preparation and openness for new situations. To have an open mind. I think armed with that, an openness for change, luck will be on your side. You need to be ready to accept change and good fortune. Otherwise, you may miss your lucky break.
My girl Maddie knows how to sport lucky green. And it is hard not to notice she resemble her favorite Girl Scout cookie, Thin Mints!
I have struggled with the idea of paying down our mortgage quickly or letting it be, to payoff slowly per the standard schedule instead. I see the mental benefits of ridding ourselves of all debt. But looking at the situation objectively, our mortgage size compared to our income is not debilitating. And having some debt is considered, by many, a good financial strategy, particularly when the debt is backed by something tangible like a property.
We are fortunate to keep our expenses lower than our income, so we have excess money leftover each month to use for saving, investing, and debt paydown. We refinanced our mortgage about 2 years ago as well with the lower rates (thanks to the pandemic), so the amount of interest charged on our mortgage is not too high as well. And if we remain disciplined (that is the big “if”) and invest the extra funds in the stock market (instead of throwing it at the mortgage), the average return may be higher. This is of course, not a given, as the market is hard to predict. But keeping money in the market over the long term generally yields higher returns than the amount of interest on our current mortgage.
This is thus the great debate I struggle with in my head as I approach our savings goals. I have long pondered this question in my own mind, and have looked for inspiration from others by reading blogs, discussion boards, and books. I have come to the conclusion that this is a personal decision, and both avenues can be correct.
I think one thing that guides me in my financial goals is how I feel when I make a decision to throw “X” amount at a goal. For example, I remember feeling much greater peace and less anxiety a few years ago when I committed to prioritizing every last penny I could at my student loan debt. And after paying off my student loans, I thought about how much to save toward college for each child. Thinking through amounts, I remember feeling a large amount of inner calm after committing to a certain amount for each child, to hopefully achieve a certain goal amount by the time they graduate high school.
I would love to see these two cuties smiling on their high school graduations. I would also love to help fund their college experiences so they can minimize the large student debt load that is all too common these days.
I think that the student loan debt I paid off aggressively was a different beast, and I am thankful I got inspired to pay it off quickly by The White Coat Investor. (I wish I could have paid it off even faster, but I did the best I could, paying it off in 6 years.) That student loan debt initially had much higher interest, and the end result (my own mind development/career development) is not something we can sell later on. A house, on the other hand, is a physical asset that can be sold, so I think it is a different kind of debt, that has more investment qualities to it.
And also, we are fortunate as a couple not to carry credit card debt. That also, I think is a totally different beast from mortgage debt, and something to pay off ASAP due to its much higher interest rate. Your loan balance can get insurmountable and can stick around forever if you are not careful, even if you are still paying the minimums. This I think is to the credit card company’s advantage, and what they obviously would prefer. They want our money.
Right now, we are paying the mortgage with a bit more each month, plus I have set up to make payments every 2 weeks. This way, once or twice a year there is an extra payment being made. I am toying with the idea of changing goals and putting more toward the mortgage, instead of my IRA, just for the psychological benefits. And with the backdoor Roth IRA potentially going away soon, this has made me think even more about throwing more of my money at the mortgage instead of my IRA. I still max out my 401k, and still invest in a brokerage account a bit extra, and save to my kids’ 529’s, and save some in a cash account for future expenses and to buildup a cash cushion. I wish I could “do it all,” but there are only so many funds available, so you need to pick and choose your priorities, and how much you want to throw at each goal.
My perspective and approach may change in the months or years to come. I think this is a healthy part of evolving interests and goals, not necessarily a sign that my current pathway is wrong. But I hope and plan to keep chipping away at this debt. Paying off more of our debt will be a rewarding experience. I am sure owning your home outright is a great feeling, a feeling I hope to know firsthand someday soon.
My daughter has recently been singing Rachel Platten’s song, Fight Song, repetitively over the last few weeks. It sounds like a classmate of hers really likes the song and got her hooked on it, too. I know, it is a few years old, but I still the lyrics inspiring and timeless. I also find it endearing she likes this powerful song, and hearing her sing it made me ponder over the lyrics more and more today. (And, of course, she is adorable with her passionate singing style, which makes it a very enjoyable experience to listen to her.)
Rachel Platten wrote the song as an anthem to keep pushing back, as the song industry was rejecting her. I love its strong message. The message I take from the song is this: you matter, and your actions matter, no matter how little you think you are as one person, or how trivial you think your single action is. Don’t short change yourself, don’t underestimate your power, even if you feel you are small or insignificant. Say what is on your mind, especially if it will help others. If you feel down and out, fight back, because you matter. You are strong. Keep going, because you can keep on fighting and keep going, even in moments that are tough. You are more significant and powerful than you think, and your voice has power. My thought is, you never know when one action will inspire someone else, or help someone else in their time of need. Your smile or kind word to another person today may turn their day around. It may inspire them to be kind to someone else, which in turn may help someone at the end of their rope.
So never stop being nice to others. Never stop pushing forward and fighting the good fight in this life. Push back against challenges and setbacks, because you can persevere. Never discount your actions, no matter how insignificant you think they are. You can be that one spark to create change for good. I hope you find this post inspiring and take this positivity forward throughout your day and week. I have included her video link below for your viewing enjoyment.
I was trodding my way through an iFitWinter treadmill workout with Billy Demong (the former Nordic combined skier and Olympian gold medalist) yesterday. During this, I think he said something that helped me put workouts and the point of workouts in perspective.
What Billy Demong said was this: Put in the work, do the workouts, follow the simple formula of “keep your hard days hard, and keep your easy days easy,” and you will improve. Your endurance and your speed will get better. Time on your feet and building endurance is like increasing the size of your engine, but by also doing hard work on hard days (speed play), you improve the speed of your engine. Both are important and vital to improving. I have heard this time and again in other books and lectures about workout plans and improving performance in sport, particularly distance running. It is a simple idea. But putting in the work itself is definitely not easy. The work is hard, and often painful, and it could be easy to give up. Showing up and doing each workout requires perseverance and diligence.
Our cat Oscar shows inspiring perseverance and grit, jumping over 3 feet in the air to reach my precious flowers. Nothing will hold this little guy down.
Billy also said it well later on in the workout that if you put in say an hour most days of the week (5-6 days/week), you will advance. It does not require many hours to get better. To be the best, you can put in 3-4 hours/day. But for my own novice athlete purposes, I can see 30-60 minutes/day, most days of the week way more doable, and achieves what I want to get, which is 70-80% better. Getting that last 10-20% improvement takes way more time and effort.
I have definitely seen this myself, particularly in my first year of following marathon training plans. In that first year, I went from essentially 0% ability to about 60% ability in marathon running pretty easily, by doing the work and finishing the workouts. From here, though, over the last 4 years, the gains have continued but are not as dramatic and not as plentiful. I agree with Billy that the key is steady, repeated work. I like seeing how my endurance and enjoyment of a longer run has steadily improved. I feel comfortable running at a faster baseline pace. I find it comforting and cathartic to get in a run most (if not all) days of the week, as my schedule allows.
I think the same thing holds true with everything else. We put in the work in school and professional/job training. Being in the very moment of grade school, high school, college, and med school, the work is hard, but doable. We do the same at work with our work goals and projects and deadlines. Chunking it up into a day, or week, or month, I can see that each goal I strive for is relatively simple and achievable.
If I focused too long or too hard on the end goal (26.2 miles, graduation from a 4 year college degree, or achieving a degree in medicine, or finishing a tough, grueling residency), I could see myself getting demoralized or overwhelmed. By being nearsighted though, each day or each week, I can see myself achieving and growing. And indeed, by piecing these days and weeks and months together, I have definitely improved and grown. I see the parallel with tough workouts and tough segments of workouts. A 2 minute push at tempo pace is hard in the moment. But afterward, the feeling of accomplishment is a huge reward in and of itself. I am sure that is why we keep going back for more workouts, and keep pursuing more goals.
I don’t yet have another race or goal in mind. But I strive to put in workouts most days, if not every day, of each week, to keep my endurance up. And it also serves to help me decompress and keep my mental health in check. I have not yet come up with a perfect schedule to coalesce with my family responsibilities and work responsibilities. I tend to squeeze in a workout here or there where it will fit, and it is not consistent day to day or week to week. But by prioritizing my health and my workouts, I can see myself performing better in my personal life and my work life.
I think my health is the best reward of all of this hard work, better than any particular medal or time on the clock at the end of the race. (But don’t get me wrong – I will keep pushing for the PR (personal record)!) Health is one of the most valuable commodities we have. I feel I need to put in the work each day and each week to nurture myself, body, mind, and spirit, to approach the best version of me. Self improvement (health wise and professional wise and family wise) is one of the most valuable rewards I have seen through my fitness journey and my journey in life. The process of getting better is a never ending process, and I look forward to continuing to improve.
6 years ago, almost to the day, my family and I were able to bring our son, Luca, home from the NICU after a 12 day stay following his premature birth. It was a very triumphant, heartfelt moment, and I am forever grateful that his stay resulted in good health, with no lasting complications. He is a healthy 6 year old boy now, and I sometimes forget how tiny he was back then. I remember how happy and relived I was to finally take him home, safe and sound, after his hospital stay.
Mr. Luca at his 1 year old birthday. Proud big sister not far away, always eager to help and guide him.
He was born about 4 weeks early, at 35 weeks+6 days. Due to him being so young, he was having problems maintaining his temperature. Hence, he spent many days spent in the NICU under the experienced, watchful eyes of the nurses and physicians. Being postpartum, I was full of emotions and was fatigued and overwhelmed, but I had an underpinning, massive desire to take my new little guy home. I was indescribably happy when the NICU team gave us the good news that March 10, 2016 would be Mr. Luca’s discharge date, and we could take him home with us to help complete our family.
Thinking back, I contemplated how different the results would have been for both me and my child decades ago. I am astounded and amazed each day by modern medicine and all of the knowledge and technology we have acquired. It enabled my son’s care to go so smoothly and enabled such good outcomes. I realize our issues were very small in retrospect as well, compared to other family’s trials. I can only imagine with what other families go through with children born even earlier or with more challenging health concerns. My outcomes also would like have been very different if the physicians and nurses did not have their experience and modern technology to monitor me closely, with my vitals, how my labor was progressing, and how my child was doing during the labor process.
Seeing also how doctors care for me and my family as we see them, I marvel at how different things were 50-100 years ago. I often credit our good health and good outcomes on all of this collective knowledge our healthcare teams have obtained.
Working in telemedicine, a relatively new player in medicine, I see that medicine still has a lot of evolution to go. I know that telemedicine has limitations, but it also opens many doors in caring for patients. I can see them right where they live and work. I can see patients with limited access to care, and all it takes is each of us having a good device (computer, cell phone, or tablet) and a good internet connection. I never shy from telling patients when telemedicine is not the right avenue to go down. But I am surprised each day by how much I can accomplish, and how grateful patients and their families are for the care we provide with this service.
Going forward, I will keep observing how modern medicine can help me, my family members and friends, and my patients. I know that things will always evolve and change, as things must. I hope that things continue to evolve and improve. I hope good and better outcomes become common place. I hope that everyone can enjoy better health because of all of these continued changes and advances.
https://youtu.be/geLfC4g_jv4
